Fen returned to his seat beneath the palm trees and chirping birds he had become acquainted with in his time beneath them. The chair itself was not the pinnacle of relaxation he had been convinced of earlier on in his life; its creaks loudly filling the vast emptiness surrounding him. However, it was quite comfortable and his only source of relief from an otherwise disappointing, wasteful, ruthless, hopeless day.
He had been waiting for hours. Fen reached into the depths of his pocket and retrieved the phone his grandchildren had recently bought him in hopes of lightening his otherwise lonely life. “Surely,” he thought, “surely she has sent something,” but once again as he desperately tried to find some kind of message from the mysterious woman who’s presence had been promised to him…
Nothing.
Fen was shocked; he had thought that with the wisdom he had gained from his old age that he would know who he could trust. They had seemed so friendly at first. With an atmosphere of joy and eagerness following them wherever they went their connection had been instant. After talking with her for what felt like hours, Fen had promised to meet with her again and had vigilantly ensured that he would be available at a moments notice to have his dreams fulfilled once more by merely being in her presence. He had never dreamed of what happened but, upon his arrival, he was greeted by the same empty feeling that was present in him now.
Nothing.
As he sat back in his seat and reminisced on the past few days (like his life was flashing before his eyes) Fen realised that there would be no surprise arrival. No future hope. No enjoyment to feel.
Nothing.
Fen drowned in nostalgia as he rested, resigned in his chair, a tower which become enveloped by darkness at the disappearance of the sun.
Abandoned.
Mark: 39/40 - grade 9
Examiners Comments:
AO5 - Compelling, convincing communication; tone/style and register assuredly matched to purpose and audience; sustained crafting and a compelling range of complex ideas (24 marks)
AO6 - Full range of sentence forms used for effect; high level of accuracy in spelling, including ambitious vocabulary (15 marks)